


Darling Witches' Heart (#6)

by BubbaKnowlton



Series: Kylux Dialogue Drabbles [6]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, BB-8 is Poe's child, Crying, Go Fish, Ice Cream, M/M, drunk kylo, inspired by the notifications of 'Wizardess' Heart: Shall We Date?', overuse of the word 'cool', phasma likes millicent more than Hux, somehow i manage to fit an anime dating game into a Star Wars fic why am i like this, somehow shrek got mentioned???
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-08
Updated: 2016-11-08
Packaged: 2018-08-29 21:25:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8505976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BubbaKnowlton/pseuds/BubbaKnowlton
Summary: #6/49 of the first sentence drabbles challenge I'm doing, is completely separate from the rest of the fics in it.Hux doesn't understand why Kylo accused him of cheating on him and then broke up with him until Phasma points out the notification settings for an app on his phone.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Y'ALL if ur here from my tumblr then u know this is the Cue that 'hey Oblio is alive and well and didnt get killed/hurt last night during that minor hell' even tho only like 2 people expressed concern and/or told me to call the cops Off of tumblr like.  
> ANYWAYS here's this which is based off the old notifications i used to get from the anime dating game Wizardess' Heart: Shall We Date? where the boys would 'send' you messages about how they missed you and loved you
> 
> post where segments are from: http://bubbaknowlton.tumblr.com/post/142980813910  
> Dialogue piece: "Is there a reason you're naked on my bed?"

**Darling Witches' Heart**

"Is there a reason you're naked in my bed?" Phasma asked, afraid of what the answer would be. She peered at Hux warily. He was lying on his stomach in her bed, his back exposed, but his lower body was covered by her blanket, a thick quilt that was much too hot to sleep under. So of course, the logical assumption was that her best friend was naked.

"I'm not fucking naked, Phasma." He pushed down the blanket to reveal he was still wearing boxers. She silently thanked whatever gods might have existed that she did not have to see his naked body ever again. And that the boxers weren't that outrageous, just yellow pinstripes with a pink band. Scratch that, she was glad it was boxers. She'd found much more revealing undergarments in his drawers back at his apartment. Some which weren't much more than lacy strings.

She had no desire to see those on her best friend, ever.

"Ok, why are you in your underwear on my bed?" He looked depressed, more so than usual. "Did something happen with Ren?" He shoved his face into her silver colored pillow and sighed. She took that as a yes and pried. "What did he do this time? Did he destroy the apartment?"

"I _wish_ it was just that." He hugged the pillow. "He was angry when I got home this evening, and accused me of cheating on him. I think he was drunk. We argued, and he said he was breaking up with me. I told him I didn't fucking care and grabbed Millicent and left."

"Baby girl's here?" Phasma immediately looked around for the cat. She spotted the tabby feline lounging on the windowsill and went to her. "Hey kitten!" Millicent meowed as Phasma rubbed her head, scratching behind her ears. "Who's a good kitten?" The cat started to purr.

Hux felt abandoned. "Hey. I was spilling my misfortunes to you."

"Sorry, you're not as interesting as Miss Kitty over here. Unless you're going to start crying or something." She spared him a glance, running her hands down Millicent's back.

"I feel like I will," Hux muttered. "I don't know what I did wrong to make him think I was cheating so while I waited for you I've been going over all of my inadequacies. It's very disheartening."

"Aw, poor boy. You're not inadequate."

"Yes I am..."

"Ren's crazy. But... you're not actually cheating on him, are you? Just to make this clear."

"I'm not. He said I was dating a girl, too, which makes it less believable. I'm gay, and have been since middle school, so he's wrong."

"Ah, middle school. Nothing like good old Empire Junior High. Where I kicked your ass and you told me you were gay over a cup of fruit chunks after soccer practice and cried."

"Shut up that's embarrassing when you say it like that. I cried because my father abused me and I admitted that right before I said I was gay."

"Good old secret sharing over a fruit-chunk cup time. We should do that again. I'll run down to the store and buy some, and a carton of strawberry ice cream for you."

"Thank you."

-

"-so I told Thannison he should go to a club if he was going to be so desperate and creepy, and he said to _me_ -" Phasma stopped as there was a ring from Hux's phone. "Did you get a text?"

Hux scooped up the phone, dropping his spoon in the ice cream he was eating. "No, that's the ring for my notifications. It's just a game."

"What game? Is it Darling Witches' Heart: Be My Love?"

As she tried to look at the screen, he turned it so she wouldn't see. He was flushing, so she knew he was right. "I thought you said you would delete the game after you finished all of Sakura's main route!" She'd forced him to play the game so she could talk to him about it. "Did you keep playing or not? No lying over the fruit cup!"

His face was steadily turning red out of shame. "I finished her route and wanted to complete the other two for her! Then I started playing Mizumi's routes since she was my favorite one to interact with..."

"No way! Of course you'd go for the tsundere nerd girl! Guess the athletic type doesn't do it for you."

"What the hell is a tsundere?"

"It's- nevermind." She wasn't going to bother explaining anime tropes to Hux, whose only anime experience was the one dating game. "It's like Ren, kind of. Hey, she kind of looks like the anime girl version of him, doesn't she? No wonder she's your favorite!"

"They're nothing alike. He's- reckless and out of control!"

Phasma snatched his phone. "They look totally alike! Ren's a total tsundere, too. Hey-" She was going to bring up a picture of the character when she realized something looking at his notification. "Do they always send notifications like this?"

"Like what?"

"An icon of the girl and a message from her telling you she wants to see you and loves you or something?"

He seemed confused as to where she was going with this. "Yes, why?"

"Are all your notifications set to the text sound?"

"Yes. My texts are set to an alarm sound."

"Oh my god." Phasma set the phone down, and lifted a hand to her head. "Oh my fucking god."

"What?"

"I figured out why Ren said you were cheating on him."

" _What?_ "

"The reason why he thinks you're cheating on him with a girl is because he must have seen a notification on your phone from Darling Witches' Heart and thought it was a text from some girl asking when your next date was and saying how much she likes you!"

Hux stared at her in silence. Horror grew on his face when he realized that she was right. "Ren broke up with me over a stupid dating game. Phasma what the _fuck?_ I lost a meaningful relationship over a stupid app!"

"Well you can get it back if you tell him the truth!"

"Phasma, I would rather die than admit to Ren that I play a dating game about cliché cartoon girls in a magic school."

"Well it looks like your only relationships from now on are gonna be with fictional anime girls and not an actual human man who genuinely loved you! Suck up your pride for once. You don't even have to describe the game, just get the point across and get your boyfriend back! And put your clothes back on I'm sorry I don't like looking at your bare noodle body."

"Okay," Hux sighed.

-

Rey awkwardly patted her cousin's head as he sobbed into a throw pillow. He was drunk and crying. She'd managed to get out from his ramble that he'd broken up with his boyfriend for cheating on him before he collapsed onto her couch and started sobbing. She felt bad for him for once. Usually when he had a bad break-up it was his fault and he threw a tantrum over it. Plus he had always been due for it, it was better for the both of them. But this one had been his best one so far, someone he actually loved a lot, and it wasn't his fault at all. She'd never pegged Hux as the type who would cheat on a partner, and her cousin obviously hadn't either.

"It's gonna be okay, cuz."

He shook his head, making a sound of disagreement. That was all she had for comforting. It was most definitely not her expertise. Neither was dealing with her cousin. Mixing the two left her essentially useless.

"Come on, you'll find somebody better than Hux. He was a snobbish jerk! There's a whole sea of guys out there who are way better than him. You two were always fighting, anyways. It's better off this way." He just squeezed the pillow tighter.

"Aunty Reeeeyyy!" She looked over to the little kid calling her name. BB-8 pouted seeing she was still next to Kylo. They came over and tugged on her arm. "You were gonna play Go Fish with me!"

"Kylo broke up with his boyfriend."

"Go Fish!" BB-8 climbed onto the couch and on top of Kylo, who slumped over. They sat on his shoulders, legs hanging around his neck. "Wouldn't you rather play Go Fish? What about you, Uncle Ky? Play Go Fish with us to forget about that weird ginger guy!"

"You're ginger, BB." Rey pointed out.

"It's _dyed_ , Aunty Rey! I'm cool," the child insisted, refusing to accidentally downplay themselves. They'd learned plenty from Poe. "Dyed hair is better than natural, unless you're Papá or Finn."

"Poe would tell you he looked cool if he went bald, painted himself green, and wore a Shrek mask, BB-8, don't take his word for everything."

"Shrek is cool, though. I love that movie."

"Besides, what about Uncle Ky's hair?" She'd heard Poe compliment Kylo's hair within vicinity of BB-8 a few times.

"He'd look cool if he wasn't so _goth_." BB-8 rolled their eyes in exasperation. So Poe revealed his true feelings to his child in private it seemed.

"Tell Poe's kid to shut up about what's cool or I'll shred their deck of cards," Kylo growled.

BB-8's eyes widened. "No! No, don't do that! I just wanna play Go Fish with you guys!"

"Go bring your deck in here, then." BB-8 slipped off and excitedly went off to get their cards.

-

Kylo played one game with them before quitting and laying across the couch. At least he'd stopped crying. Rey was thankful for that. As BB-8 laid down another pair, the doorbell rang.

"Let's pause for a bit, BB. Kylo, make sure they don't look at my cards."

"I don't cheat!" BB-8 insisted. Rey placed her cards face down on the floor and went to answer the door.

She came face to face with someone she was sure she would not be seeing again if her cousin's depressed mood meant anything; Hux. The redhead looked a bit embarrassed about something.

"Oh, it's _you_. What are you doing here?"

"Coming to get my boyfriend back."

"You cheated on him! He found a text from some girl!"

"That wasn't a text and I'm about to prove it." He pushed past her, phone in hand. She tried to stop him but unfortunately her apartment was small and he spotted Kylo quickly. "Ren!"

"Hux?!" Kylo shot up. "What- what do you want?"

"I never cheated on you!"

"Yes you did!"

Hux pulled down the notifications on his phone. "You saw that text, right?"

"You admit it, even!"

"Well, Ren, just look at my phone. When you click on an actual text message, it brings you to the messaging app." He clicked on a recent text from Phasma that said 'like this my dude', and like he said, it brought up the app and their texting history. 

"So?"

" _So,_ " Hux brought up the notifications again, where the supposed 'text' was, "Click on that."

"I don't want to see your messages with this girl!"

"Click it!" Kylo did, reluctantly. It brought up the loading screen for the game, Darling Witches' Heart: Be My Love?, featuring the blatantly fake and anime scene of the girls all grouped together in front of their magic school. "See, Ren? It's a game!"

"What?"

"The message is from a game! It's some dating game Phasma forced me to play, it sends notifications as if you're receiving messages from the fake girls in the game."

"Oh my god."

"I never cheated on you, I was just coerced into playing a stupid game."

" _Oh my god._ " Kylo buried his face in his hands. Hux sat next to him. "I'm sorry..."

"No, it was just a misunderstanding. It really is an easy mistake."

"I feel like an idiot..."

"You're my idiot. Are we together again?"

"Mhmm."

BB-8 had had enough of this. "I wanna keep playing Go Fish!"

**Author's Note:**

> Follow/talk to me on Tumblr! @Oblioknowlton
> 
> i also drew a picture for this fic  
> http://oblioknowlton.tumblr.com/image/148717368810


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